Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Ex-Girlfriend Salsa

A box in my basement holds artifacts from failed relationships. You won't find love notes, pictures, or gifts from former girlfriends, but you will find books and cassettes, all possessions I borrowed from old flames. Someday I expect to find a former girlfriend at my doorstep demanding her Less Than Zero movie soundtrack and copy of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. Such worries parade through my mind on a regular basis. It's tough being muddywaters.

Anyway, today I want to talk about ex-girlfriends and recipes. Until I met my wife, I never had a girlfriend who was skilled in the kitchen, so sadly I don't possess any recipes from ex-girlfriends. However, I know that there are individuals out there who've acquired recipes from exes.

Exhibit A:

Today's salsa recipe is from a coworker who got it from his ex-girlfriend.

At The Greasy Skillet, we like to make fresh salsa in the summer. We eat a lot of pico de gallo, mango salsa, and black bean and corn salad. If we buy a canned salsa from the grocery store, we prefer Senor Stan's, a product of Lawrence, KS.
Since I hate spending $3.00 for a jar of salsa when I can produce a similar product for half the price, I use my coworker's ex-girlfriend's sala recipe.

Ex-Girlfriend Salsa


  • 1 can of regular Ro-Tel
  • 1 can of Mexican Ro-Tel(It contains lime juice and cilantro)
  1. Simply place the ingredients in a blender, pulse 10-12 times, and you're ready to serve.
  2. If you want to doctor the recipe to your taste, feel free to add the following: salt, sugar, cilantro, onions, or peppers.
Do you have any recipes from a former boyfriend or girlfriend in your cooking repertoire?

Clean out those closets,

PS. . . In the exhaustive research I did for this post, I found a book titled The Ex-Boyfriend Cookbook: They Came, They Cooked, They Left (But We ended Up with Some Great Recipes).


Sara Reddy Coyne said...

Oh, you should most definitely add the aji recipe to your salsa repertoire! I promise you'll be a fan (especially if you like cilantro). The vinegar and lemon and cilantro make it taste fresh and a little puckery and you'll want to slather it on everything.

I was told about 15 times from the Colombians I staid with to NEVER use lime in the recipe. Only lemon. Strangers practically stopped me in the street to tell me this, so it must be muy importante.

rebel said...

How funny. Can't say that I have any recipes from exes. I don't think I ever dated anyone who could cook, and Oh My Goodness can my husband so not cook!

Rechelle said...

Senor Stan's is most awesome salsa in universe. Eet ees worth the dinero Muddy.

Rotel cures everything from bland soup to soupy boils. I love me some Rotel.

Kate said...

I love the Barbie-as-Vanna-White shot. Very nice.

Anonymous said...

Weird... just last week, I linked up with an old girlfriend via a new social networking site. (You can check out the link via the Training Table if you click my name above.) And the first thing I asked her was, do you still have the recipe for that chicken salad that your sister used to make? (Her sister was a CIA-trained chef, working in a howtie-towtie restaurant in San Francisco.) I didn't ask how she had been, didn't ask about her dog, didn't ask about anything "serious"... I just wanted to get my hands on that old recipe!!

Anonymous said...

Best salsa i ever had in my life was made by a buddy when i was living in Hawaii. I lost the recipe, but it was 100% canned ingredients. I wasn't much of a foodie back then and didn't bother to write down the recipe... but the "secret" was something like dumping in the liquid from the can of jalepenos and then simmering it for 30 minutes.

Upon reflection, I definitely spelled "howtie-towtie" incorrectly!!

muddywaters said...

12th Man: Are you going to post the chicken salad recipe?

muddywaters said...

Sara: I'll let you know how the recipes goes.

Rebel: I bet your husband cooks at least one thing well.

Rechelle: I love Senor Stan's, and I do believe eet ees worth the dinero, but my penny pinching ways cause me to seek cheaper alternatives. If you try this recipe, I think you'll like it.

Anonymous said...

I have to admit, it wasn't all that the second time around. I must have been blinded by love or something. The recipe in our cookbook for Asian chicken salad is much, much better!!

Eric J. Gruber said...

I was wondering if I could have permission to use your photo of Senor Stan's Salsa (with Barbie) for my blog post (http://www.ericjgruber.com/blog/2010/11/rip-senor-stan-schneck/) about the owner who passed away Nov. 1.

muddywaters said...


That would be fine. I'm sorry to hear about Mr. Schneck's passing.

Anonymous said...

Stan Schneck was my father the family is still producing the salsa it will still be on the shelfs to buy

AD said...

senor stan was my dad. his salsa is still being made and is still being sold.I love hearing stories about how much people liked my dad's salsa...

Anonymous said...

Is the salsa still being sold? I can't find it anywhere. I have yet to find one as good!